Susan Boyle and The Wizard of Oz

I was in a checkout line with my mother the other day. Susan Boyle was on the cover of some trash magazine or other, and my mother asked me who she was. (Susan Boyle, I mean. As far as I know my mother knows who she is. In the basic sense, at least.) So I did my best to explain. It went something along the lines of:

Susan Boyle is a middle aged British lady who went on a popular British tv talent show. Because she was unattractive, everyone assumed she would suck, but then it turned out she could sing well, and everyone was astounded and she became famous overnight. Becasue apparently no one unattractive or middle aged could possibly be talented.

I know I am not the first person to say this, but that is fucked up.

At the same time, I look back to the early teachings of my childhood, and it fits. Glinda tells us flat-out:

"Only bad witches are ugly."

Glinda is also fucked up. Or more specifically, she seems to love to fuck with tourists. Granted she gives Dorothy the red shoes, but despite the fact that she could go home right then, with three clicks of the heel, Glinda sends her on a wild goose chase around Oz. "Oh, you need directions home? Well see that friggin longass yellow brick road? Well follow that till you get to a green palace. Ask them to take you to their leader, and he'll totally get you home! Good luck! Oh, and don't be surprised if a green witch and her cronies try to kill you on the way." The amazing part is she is never held accountable for her actions. While the "Wicked Witch of the West" gets melted just for trying to collect on her inheritance after Dorothy inadvertantly drops a friggin HOUSE on her sister, Glinda gets away with her shenanagins with a version of "teehee! gotcha!" Lesson learnt. Pretty people are not punishable.